Londis Carpenter

SCAM ALERT

Fri, 26 Feb 2010 16:31:00 +0000

SCAM ALERT - scammers are posting bogus ads promising (non-existent!) employment, paid research trials, or other compensation, on sites like craigs llist and other sites such as my guestbook, but then notifying repliers that they'll need to jump through a hoop first, directing them to:

background checking services,credit checking or reporting sites, sites where you are instructed to enter your resume, or other personal information sites where you are asked to sign up for a "free" trial offer, sites offering training or education, sites offering a "system" for making money survey, or focus group sites sites designed to deliver malware or misuse your identifying information.

All of these in hopes of earning affiliate marketing commissions, or otherwise profiting at the expense of persons seeking employment.

There are ots of variations on this scam, but each generally involves dangling (non-existent!) compensation, and then directing you to a website whereyou are asked to sign up for something, use your credit card, or input personal information such as your email address.

While any such posts are daily eliminated from my guest book, reader be warned and do not fall for any such scams.

FUN FACT: If you are able to determinea scammer's "affiliate ID" and report it to their affiliate marketing program, this will often result in termination of the scammer, and confiscation of the scammer's ill-gotten gains by the affiliate program.

Why I Quit Smoking, short fiction

Sun, 21 Feb 2010 10:37:00 +0000

“You know that stuff is going to kill you, so just leave it alone and you’ll be happy,” The Prime Minister said.

The PM might just as easily have been have been the President, or Commandant, or Czar, or Secretariat of any other country in the free world (yours or mine or even yours). He was a jovial gentleman and politician, who had obviously earned the right to be a ruler over his countrymen, because he cared deeply about humanity and the rights and well being of people. He obviously cared about me and my health, which explained why he always nagged me for my cigar smoking habit. Smoking kills, everyone knows that. And he certainly cared for the safety of his people because he was willing to risk the lives of their sons and daughters to fight off the unnamed terrorists with every terrible weapon he had at his disposal. He had just a few moments before reassigned me from my job in the chemical warfare Research and Development Center to a higher paying new job in nuclear armament.

I inhaled deeply and let out a smooth cloud of smoke from my Havana cigar, which was the object to which he had just made reference. At that exact moment an enormous blast from a couple miles outside the city, where a bomb had just exploded into the local schoolhouse, rocked our building. It was later reported that the bomb had left sixty children and three teachers severely maimed or killed. After hearing the report, the Prime Minister said it was just collateral damage. He explained that we needed to expect to, pay a terrible price in bloodshed to defend our right to live under the rule of law. He had once told me he would like to make a law that banned tobacco altogether. Before we parted company for the evening he scolded me again about the dangers of smoking and offered to use his GSA connections get me some nicotine patches but I refused. Why risk getting the kind politician in trouble for something so trivial.

The next morning, on the way to a staff meeting, I overheard the PM explaining to a local tobacco grower that it was okay for him to continue growing and marketing his product as long as he was willing to pay an extortion tax (well he actually called it a tariff). The tax, having already reached an exorbitant fee, seemed to be growing at a rate faster then the crop being taxed. There were huge TV screens on every corner of the city now-a-days with the volume of the speakers set to a level that could be heard above the din of traffic. At this very moment the well known figure on the TV screen was citing the number of people who died every three seconds from second hand cigarette smoke. Without being consciously aware of my actions, I dropped the cigar I had been holding onto the ground and crushed it under my foot.

“I’m going to have to quit these things,” I mumbled to myself.

I had been hoping to hear the latest body count from the war on terror. I knew that most of our hospitals were filled to overflowing with wounded civilians, mostly women and children, but the announcer never got around to mentioning the war at all. Instead, after he said goodbye and that he would see us tonight on the late night news, an ad appeared on the screen telling us to be sure to sign up for the new identity chip that was scheduled to soon be implanted in the skin of our right hand. It's reported purpose was to protect us all from identity theft. (I actually recalled reading once about some woman who had lost her purse and discovered that her credit card had been used to purchase a computer or something). I reminded myself to place this higher on my priority list. It was something I had been procrastinating about taking care of and I needed to just do it. I thought about perhaps calling for an appointment this afternoon.

Another bomb exploded in the distance and then another. I saw the darkened northern sky fill with a giant black cloud. I felt a warm fuzzy feeling inside my stomach as I continued to the staff meeting at the nuclear bomb plant. I felt lucky to be part of a great country like ours and I thought once again about the need to quit smoking; I resolved to quit once and for all. It is funny the foolish things people do. Everyone knows smoking kills people.

Feel the fear and do it anyway

Thu, 16 Jul 2009 12:28:00 +0000

To thse who understand http://www.webspawner.com/users/feelthefearanddo/index.html

What Happens In space Should Stay In Space

Sat, 01 Nov 2008 17:20:00 +0000

In July of 2007 I read an article that NASA was spending 19 million US dollars for a Russian built space toilet. A NASA spokesman said that it was a bargain price compared from building one from scratch. Not being a plumber myself, what do I know? Why not have a swank potty in space, perhaps even with a stack of old Buck Rogers comics floating around.

http://www.techmeme.com/070708/p2#a070708p2

Here's my problem. On the Today show news this morning they reported that the thing already broke, and I felt that bristling tingle of hairs on the back or my neck rising as a warning that all is not safe. This surely cannot end well.

So I did what I always do in a crisis. I wrote a poem. Hope you enjoy reading it to pass the time that we have left before

Londis Carpenter

SCAM ALERT

Why I Quit Smoking, short fiction

Feel the fear and do it anyway

What Happens In space Should Stay In Space

Nineteen million NASA's price

To build its crew a safe device

So astronauts could have a place

To handle pee and fecal waste

And men of space would have a loo

To do what other men must do

These millions bucks NASA would pay

So no spaceman would float away

These men were safe from their own farts

With leg restraints and other parts

And all was safely put in place

A porta-potty out in space

But something?s wrong I heard today

An amber rain on its way

No place to hide no place to run

A loo in space has come undone

From far in space a cry unheard

A spaceman hit by a flying turd